Thank you for this, I have been struggling with this lately with people being upset with my partner for 'enabling' the toxic behaviours of his other partner. I have been really bad with enabling myself in the past, so I have compassion for him and how it is hard to see, especially because you are treating a toxic/abusive person the way you would anyone else you care about; the problem is they are the ones not reacting like a healthier person might and know how to perpetuate it to keep you doing what they want. I mean, that is how abuse/manipulation works.

It's strange to me that these same people can have compassion for me when I am enabling people who are bad for me, but when it comes to my partner he should just 'know' better. You can work on recognizing it, but even the most savvy people can be forced into enabling. Often it doesn't give one much of a choice, that's WHY it's abuse/manipulation/toxic.

*nodnod* it is easier to have empathy for the one you know, but it's important to have it for all people.

Thank you so much for saying this.

<3

This is really very validating for me. I've been doing a lot of thinking on the subject as my marriage ends, and it invoked a lot of feelings when I read it. They're kind of tangled right now, but I'll try to share them when they get untangled.

Thanks for saying this. It's true.

*offers hugs* I am glad this felt validating for you <3