I went grocery shopping today with a list (on my phone via colornote, it's awesome) and coupons loaded on my Kroger card, and WOW that was satisfying. And now I feel so good about life, so safe and so taken care of, just knowing that there is food in my kitchen. I've realized that to perform good self-care, I need to go grocery shopping once a week (when I can afford it), instead of waiting until I have nothing left in the house but crackers and condiments. It is hugely draining and depressing to me to know that I have very little food, and yet spending money stresses me out so much that I avoid going to get food even when I can actually afford it. This is so counterproductive, but it's almost a compulsion; it's like I think if I avoid going shopping, maybe I can make my food last longer. The only way I can think to make sure that doesn't happen is to go shopping once a week. That's the best way to find cheap stuff anyway; so, new goal for me.