openmindedness / 'lolita' and molestation
I've posted this twice before, I think... now it has altered slightly, and it seems like a good time to repost.
open-mindedness is NOT:
----having no opinions of your own but agreeing with everyone else's
----agreeing with whatever is most liberal at the time
----having liberal or unpopular opinions which you do not permit to change
----allowing your opinions to be swayed once in a blue moon
----forming opinions based on one point of view
----having no guidelines for what you wish to saturate your mind with
openmindedness IS:
forming opinions based on a fair assessment of several differing points of view -- and then allowing your opinions to change upon learning new, convincing information.
Thus, to be openminded you MUST:
----be willing to research several differing points of view before forming an opinion
----be willing to have an unpopular opinion
----be willing to alter your perception of reality
----believe that what is true for yourself may not be true for others
(based on these principles, this list will be altered as I think on it more. Feel free to share your own ideas)
I have been accused of being closed-minded for not wanting to read the book 'Lolita' or hear anything about it, which I find utterly ridiculous. I have personal experience with incestual sexual abuse, and reading that book would certainly not 'expand my mind' or tell me anything I don't already know. I know the excuses victimizers make to themselves -- I've heard it all firsthand. It might, MIGHT, have some use for someone who has never experienced sexual abuse, because it might open their mind to what molestation does and the devastation it causes in both victim and victimizer (although I am quite convinced that there are far better ways of learning that information), and if they had never experienced it, perhaps it wouldn't have a negative effect on them by triggering memories. It has absolutely no positive use for me. None. And that means that I am not 'open-minded' by the standards of those who think that one should allow everyone else's opinion to sway them, which is fine with me. Just because YOU think it would give me a new perspective doesn't mean it would. I have had enough sexual abuse in my life and I don't need to go seeking out a vicarious method of experiencing it, even if it it phrased prettily; if I want to read pretty phrasing, I will read poetry about something other than molestation.
We are all responsible for what we allow to influence us; for that reason, I do not saturate my mind with just anything.
open-mindedness is NOT:
----having no opinions of your own but agreeing with everyone else's
----agreeing with whatever is most liberal at the time
----having liberal or unpopular opinions which you do not permit to change
----allowing your opinions to be swayed once in a blue moon
----forming opinions based on one point of view
----having no guidelines for what you wish to saturate your mind with
openmindedness IS:
forming opinions based on a fair assessment of several differing points of view -- and then allowing your opinions to change upon learning new, convincing information.
Thus, to be openminded you MUST:
----be willing to research several differing points of view before forming an opinion
----be willing to have an unpopular opinion
----be willing to alter your perception of reality
----believe that what is true for yourself may not be true for others
(based on these principles, this list will be altered as I think on it more. Feel free to share your own ideas)
I have been accused of being closed-minded for not wanting to read the book 'Lolita' or hear anything about it, which I find utterly ridiculous. I have personal experience with incestual sexual abuse, and reading that book would certainly not 'expand my mind' or tell me anything I don't already know. I know the excuses victimizers make to themselves -- I've heard it all firsthand. It might, MIGHT, have some use for someone who has never experienced sexual abuse, because it might open their mind to what molestation does and the devastation it causes in both victim and victimizer (although I am quite convinced that there are far better ways of learning that information), and if they had never experienced it, perhaps it wouldn't have a negative effect on them by triggering memories. It has absolutely no positive use for me. None. And that means that I am not 'open-minded' by the standards of those who think that one should allow everyone else's opinion to sway them, which is fine with me. Just because YOU think it would give me a new perspective doesn't mean it would. I have had enough sexual abuse in my life and I don't need to go seeking out a vicarious method of experiencing it, even if it it phrased prettily; if I want to read pretty phrasing, I will read poetry about something other than molestation.
We are all responsible for what we allow to influence us; for that reason, I do not saturate my mind with just anything.
