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no subject
Date: 2012-09-25 02:52 pm (UTC)Since you're making the effort to get out there and share your experiences, I'll go ahead and share mine:
My appearance doesn't jive with stereotypical notions of what an anti-gender, pro-human right feminist should look like. I love pink and glitter and dresses and flowers and gloriously flowing clothing. In mainstream communities, I find that this means I'm automatically treated as stupid (because, of course, anything not explicitly masculine must be). In feminist and similar communities, I find I'm treated as some sort of traitor to the cause because I'm not wearing the oh-so-boring androgynous white button down and tie that all of my female-identified friends are wearing. I've felt for a long time that the problem here wasn't me, but had nagging doubts that perhaps it was. I've found myself wearing jeans (which I hate because they constrict my crotch) and t-shirts (which I hate because they constrict my larger-than-average breasts) and no make-up (which I hate because I love, love, LOVE painting myself) to social justice events just so that I don't feel like an outsider.
And the end result of this attempt to not be an outsider is that I'm betraying myself just to appear like I'm not somehow betraying the cause. Now I have a way to explain it: expecting only female-identified people to "cover" their gender is the same old bullshit masculine orientation that we all want to get rid of. And while it's true that most little girls are socialized to love pink and makeup and etc., it's equally true that most people are socialized to believe that masculine gender presentations are superior. The now-adult little girls who still love pink and who refuse to wear it are just accepting more of the same bullshit.
I'm wearing my vintage bubblegum pink dress, all the glitter I can manage and my super-comfy tennis shoes to the next social justice event I attend. I'll be much more comfortable, even if people do give me funny looks. And I have you to thank :-)