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belenen

April 2021

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Expect to find curse words, nudity, (occasionally explicit) talk of sex, and angry ranting, but NEVER slurs or sexually violent language. I use TW when I am aware of the need and on request.

Date: 2006-03-31 06:20 am (UTC)
As a slightly abstract opinion (I haven't read the whole thing myself, it just doesn't keep my interest and isn't to my taste) that is very to the point, I feel that the book actually discourages pedophillia and molestation (it is about the former but not so much about the latter). I think that the consequences for everyone involved in that story are probably pretty realistic and none of them seem to be good.

However with that said, if you strip the book to it's essence it's basically about the negative aspects of desire, about letting desire control you/go too far etc. So considering that and your background I don't necessarilly see it as being beneficial to you in particular or to sexual abuse victims in general.

Anyway I hope you'll enlighten me on something that I've pondered for some time. Generally speaking from a psychological point of view, if something bothers a person it's best to get it out in the open, to work at getting accustomed to it, in other words to deal with it. In my personal experience and to my minorly educated knowledge that should hold true to anything so should it not be true of your own experiences? I realize that they are very painful but since everyone deals with pain differently it's even possible for a particularly sensitive individual to have been hurt more by being slapped by their mother one time than some people are by protracted sexual abuse. I realize that sounds a bit preposterous but I can assure you that people are so different that it's indeed so. The point I'm trying to make there is that I don't think the source of the pain should dynamically change the way that the pain should be dealt with.

I only say this since even though I can understand your desire to not be hurt unnecessarilly by things I think that the time is past when it's a good idea to try and hide yourself from that which might hurt you. Instead you should work to rise above it and not let it bother you anymore. Or so I think. That's getting to it more directly though, the method for treating sexual abuse victims might be a bit more roundabout and subtle, it's not my field of expertise. In case your curious my expertise is dreams and withdrawal, I had hoped to be a counsellor specializing in social withdrawal syndrome and the like but it turns out that's probably not the path for me. I remain a busybody who approaches things with psychology and personal logic though as you can see.
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